KARMA

Although Islam views all human dramas as the will of Allah (God), the Koran states that the good or bad fortunes that befall man are the results of God's reactions to man's own actions as shown from part 28 (Surat Al-Qasas), part 3 (Surat Al-Imran), and part 30 (Surat Al-Ruum).^[47][48][49]

(sumber : wikipedia)

__________________________________________________________________________

Assalamualaikum y'all. May Allah bless each of you who read this entry. :)

Karma. In our words, it will goes like, "She used to treat people like that, that's why people treat her that way", "she rejected many people before that's why she doesn't have a boyfriend", "she never lend a help when we need'em, that's why nobody wants to help her", etc etc etc. yeah. typical.

but see, maybe some of us did that for a reason. a reason that somehow he/she couldn't delivered to anybody. a reason that lies beneath the action that we have to dig to actually know the truth. maybe someone will. maybe no one will. C'mon guys, think positive.

okay. let me tell you my pathetic secret. I never give a commitment in a relationship a.k.a I never coupled with anyone a.k.a I never have a companion a.k.a boyfriend. yeah. I know. Pathetic. It's not like no one never like me, or attempt to win my heart. It's just me. I don't feel like I want to have one. I don't want to fools anybody's feeling, not ready, sort of. And when I'm ready, and few attempts has been made, the results is negative.

people kept on saying, it's because of your bad action in your past. that's why you have no boyfriend. All of them end up becoming your friends. nice job. good job. yeah. I know. But for me, I don't think that way. It happens because that someone is not my destiny. If he is mine, Allah will show us the way. seriously. I admit, seeing my friends hiding behind the pillow while talking to the phone, climb the stair like a kingkong just to answer a call, smile widely after the long talk, and keep on telling about their dates over and over again, does make me think. when will I experience all of this? or will I experience all of this? Wau'llahuallam.

Frankly speaking, I don't think that bad stuffs happens because we did the same in the past, no, big no. It's resulting from our behavior. behavior towards the Almighty. How we forget Him when we are happy, how we forget to pray as He told us to, how we didn't miss Him as much as He misses us, how we disappointing the Almighty after all of the fortunes He gives. I felt so small. So sinful. So ungrateful. Forgive me Ya Allah.

We can't shuts people mouth. yeah. but we can ask to Him to open their heart to be a better person in the future and give us enough strength to face His challenge. See, I'm rejecting people for a reason. It's never been an easy decision. Whatever the reason is, only He knows.

Now, I'm hoping. Praying. Wishing. Remembering. Ya Allah, You let me feel the happiness that I never experience before. You gave me guts to let him look me eyes to eyes. You let me appreciate the beauty of Your creation. Ya Allah, I felt so bless. I am deeply ashamed to ask from You, Ya Allah. You gave me a lot, but I kept on forgetting. I'm such an ungrateful servant of Yours. Forgive me. But if he is my destiny, show us the way. Protect him along the way Ya Allah. Let him be my first and my last love. Thank you Ya Allah.

HARI ITU DIA KAHWIN

Hari itu hari Ahad. Aku bangun awal. Serika baju dan siapkan diri. Kemudian, tonton Spontan season 2 sebelum bertolak ke suatu tempat.

Dalam perjalanan, semua ceria. Gelak terkekeh-kekeh. Nyanyi girang dan sumbang. Riuh rendah. Dan sesat merata-rata. Sampai sahaja, aku berdebar. Mana tak nya, dah 11 tahun aku tak jumpa dia, kawan sekolah dulu, yang kahwin hari itu.

Seorang lelaki menjemput kami. Dia tanya, kawan Anis kah? Aku kata, ya kenapa? Dia kata ikut sini. Dijari dia aku lihat ada inai. Jadi aku tanya, nih husband dia? Dia senyum sipu lapar kaki dan menjawab ya. Jalan berlorong, lohong, lopong. Yang dapat aku dengar dalam perjalanan itu adalah bunyi tapak kaki dan bunyi perutku yang lapar tahap dewa. Sampai disana, dia jerit, PAYEDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD!! lepas tu dia buat bunyi muah muah muah. aku senyum. lamanya tak jumpa.

Aku teman dia. aku sembang-sembang dengan dia. kemudian aku pergi makan. dia cakap tunggulah lama sikit, lama tak jumpa nih. jadi aku tunggu dia. dan merapu dengan dia. sekali-sekala. tak apa punya. hehe

kemudian, aku ikut mereka shoot. nih aku tampalkan sekali gambar yang aku sempat selinap masa kat sana. yay!

PS : Selamat Pengantin Baru Anis! Semoga kekal hingga akhir hayat. :)

IS DATING HARAM?

As I was reblogging like a boss at Tumblr, I came across this post. I think its interesting so I would like to share with you people! :)

SuperMuslims: Is Dating Haram?

supermuslims:

Let me start by explaining that the word “haram” means forbidden. For something to be forbidden, it has to be either stated clearly in the Qur’an or by Prophet Mohamed (PBUH.) However, that does not mean that it is not wrong. Anything could be either wrong or right. It depends on the way you use it. Is watching television haram? It wasn’t stated in the Qur’an, so does that mean that it is ok no matter how inappropriate the content is? Of course not. It depends on how you use (or abuse it.) If you watch inappropriate stuff which is infact haram, then yes it is. Music, television, and the internet are all means of leading you to haram. But is it not infact haram.

Do you understand that part?

Islam encourages Muslims to marry persons for whom they have special feelings and are comfortable with. Thus, Islam recommends that potential marriage partners see one another before proposing marriage. Explaining the reason for such a recommendation, Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said: “That would enhance/foster the bonding.”

However the prospective couple shall not meet in private, this might lead to extremely unwanted situations, as Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) said: “Whenever a man is alone with a woman, Satan is the third among them?” (Reported by At-Tirmidhi).

At all times, Muslims should follow the commands of the Qur’an “Tell the believing men to lower their gaze (from looking at forbidden things), and protect their private parts (from illegal sexual acts, etc.). That is purer for them.”

In conclusion, Islam lays its social structure on the basis of a permanent relationship between a man and a woman in the form of a family.

Consequently, to preserve this marital relationship, it forbids all forms of temporary relationships between a man and a woman. Pre-marital relationships in Islam are not considered respectful for neither the man nor the woman, nor is it constructive for the concept or the building the family or the Islamic society.

Anything that I may have said that is correct, is from Allah (SWT) and all praise and glory is for Him and for Him alone. Anything that I may have said that is in error, is mine and I pray for forgiveness and to be led to the truth. InshaAllah!

TOLONGLAH KAN

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE LET ME GET WHAT I WANT by THE SMITH

Good times for a change
See, the luck I've had
Can make a good man turn bad

So please please please
Let me, let me, let me
Let me get what I want this time

Haven't had a dream in a long time
See, the life I've had
Can make a good man bad

So for once in my life
Let me get what I want
Allah knows it would be the first time
(last tu aku dah tukaq. hehe)

Boleh tak? tak besar pun. kecik ja. Boleh la kan, boleh please? :)

PERFECT ZERO

I'm not perfect as His servant.

I'm not perfect as a daughter.

I'm not perfect as a sister.

I'm not perfect as an aunt.

I'm not perfect as a niece.

I'm not perfect as a grand daughter.

I'm not perfect as a friend.

I'm not perfect as a girl.

I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY.

I'm not perfect. I'm not perfect. I'm not perfect.

I'M SORRY I CAN'T BE PERFECT.

GELENYOR BENOR

ATTENTION !

Please read this entry in your most "gelenyor" voice evah!

_____________________________________________________________

I'm like the most like diehard fan of Harry Potter, you know.

He is like so so so genius and cute with the scar on his forehead.

OMG like he is cute okay? I felt like I want to chew him sometimes!

haha haha haha haha haha (snuff snuff snuff)

okay. howevah, I think I'm so into Voldermort, although he doesn't have a nose.

Like he had a hole but no nose, like, ya know?!!!!!

by the way, I heard that he has been appointed as the Loreal's spokeperson.

And I'm like, OMG, what product shall he used?!?!!

He is like, ya know, got no hair, nose, and got a very deeply pale skin like?

OMG!! this is great!

PS : aku baru sudah tengok Paris Hilton punya cerita. So aku cuba act like a bimbo. tengok jadi cemana. haha haha haha okay. rasa macam nak tekap serika panas dekat muka T.T

ABDUL SI KUCING HITAM PUTIH BERTOPI BELANG BUKAN HIDUNG BELANG

Abdul, si kucing hitam putih bertopi belang-belang, gemar buat begini tatkala tidak diberi makan chicken chop sebaliknya diberi makan Whiskas perisa Ocean fish. T.T

dimana disana disini

Aku suka ini. Aku suka itu. Aku suka begini. Aku suka begitu. Bebel. Bebel. Kau bebel tak henti. ketawa. Dan aku ketawa. terkekeh-kekeh.

tapi hari ini kau sunyi. di. telefon. bimbit. lah. kan. tapi, kau bising dilaman itu. kau coretkan didinding muka buku kau kata-kata puitis hak puih puih. jarang kau begini. diri kau hilang. punca kau hilang.

Aku fikir. Dan fikir. Dan fikir. Lalu aku tekapkan muka kau dimesin photostat dan buat salinan sebanyak mungkin dengan diskripsi yang berkata, PHOTOSTAT 3 SEN.

JARI DILEHER DIA

satu, satu, rokok Dunhill dia hisap. katanya, aku stress. kata aku, kalau stress, buat macam nih. sambil ambil bantal tutup muka dan jerit macam orang gila. dia senyum. untuk 5 saat. kemudian, dia termenung lagi.

aku buntu. seharian dah aku lacurkan idea aku untuk buat dia ketawa. aku hantar sms berbaur humor. kononnya, dia boleh ketawa. kononnya. dia ketawa, tapi lepas itu dia masamkan balik muka. aku rasa hampa. apa lagi aku perlu buat?

tiba-tiba aku terpandang satu gergaji merah yang agak berkarat ditepi pintu. aku ambil dan acuh untuk gergaji jari-jemari mulus lagi tulus aku ini. dia ketawa. kemudian, aku acuh lagi. dia ketawa lagi. aku gergaji jari jemari aku kemudiannya. dia pandang sambil hisap Dunhill dan kata cun, boleh aku buat loket.

SEMALAM, HARI INI DAN ESOK

Semalam, dia patah hati. lagi.

Hari ini, aku susah hati. lagi.

Esok, hati aku dan dia akan basi.

PEN AJAIB, KATANYA

Masa dekat pasar seni tempoh hari, aku ada beli pen. Pen ini ajaib, Cina tu kata. Ajaib yang macam mana aku tanya. Lalu dia ambil senaskah majalah, dia lakar digambar yang ada dekat majalah tu dan gambar itu menjadi nyata. Dia tanya, nak beli tak? Aku cakap okay. Kemudian, aku sorokkan dari kau sebab tak mahu kau lakarkan ia dekat majalah perempuan separuh bogel untuk buat ia jadi nyata.

sekarang aku cuba nak lakar muka Brandon Boyd supaya dia jadi nyata. Tunggu ya.

KEMBANG KEMPIS

Dengan setiap nafas yang dihembus tetapi dia masih tidak happy, tangan mulus tapi berparut di ibu jari ini memberontak ingin menarik tangannya dan ajak menari. di. tepi .pe. ri. gi.

JUS MATA KIRI

Dia termenung. Aku tanya kenapa? Dia kata aku nampak. Aku tanya bila. Dia kata semalam. Aku tanya kau nampak dengan mata yang nih sambil tunjuk guna jari. Dia kata ya. Lalu aku korek mata itu dan letak dalam blender dan buat jus. Kemudian aku bagi dia minum. Dia kata terima kasih.

sini tutup sana buka

Alhamdulillah. Syukur. Syukur. Alhamdulillah. :)

hari ini

dan hari ini, Seth dan Nora Elena dapat hidup dengan bahagia tanpa gangguan Yvonne yang sudah edan itu.

dan hari ini, Batrisya Hanna yang berusia 31 hari dapat suntikan kedua sejak dia dilahirkan.

dan hari ini, hati aku dipijak dengan kasut bola. remuknya kali nih seperti cupcake yang dilenyek dengan tragis oleh basikal tua dengan slow motion nya.

dan hari ini, sama seperti hari-hari sebelumnya kecuali bahagian aku bakar cupcake serta sekeping plastic yang aku lupa alih dari dalam oven -.-"

Published with Blogger-droid v1.6.9

ALFIYYAH HANNA

Dia riang. hyper active. creative. positive. talkative. Dia selalu marah kalau aku panggil dia dengan nama. Dia akan kata, panggil KAKAK! hehe dan acap kali aku panggil namanya, dia tak akan paling atau sahut. Ya. Bebal bukan?

Baru-baru ini, ibu dia masuk hospital. dia dan maktok tunggu diluar. Babah dia pun sama. Semua dalam keadaan ternanti-nanti. Tiba-tiba, mereka digemparkan dengan satu bunyi teriakan. teriakan yang dinanti. Dia lompat gembira sambil jerit, KAKAK DAH DAPAT ADIK!!!! dia lompat-lompat. Tertitis air mata Maktok. Maktok gegas ke dalam. Kira jari jemari dan periksa adiknya. Alhamdulillah. Semua ada. Ibunya tersenyum. Alhamdulillah. Alhamdulillah. Penantian yang berbaloi baloi.

Baru-baru ini, cikgu minta dia buat karangan. Karangan pendek. Dia balik, ambil pen dan mula menulis. Mulanya, marker pen berwarna pink nya menari-nari melakar cerita tentang sepupunya, Nabila. Tapi bila dia ingatkan kembali insiden Nabila mengetuk kepalanya, dia berhenti. Lalu dia tukar kepada pen biru. Pen itu menari tak henti. Ternanti. Kemudian, dia bagi ibu dia baca. Ini katanya.

Riuh bertempik rumah jadinya. Riuh dengan gelak tawa. Itulah Alfiyyah Hanna. Kanak-kanak kecil yang dalam matanya tersembunyi seribu satu rasa. Rasa yang dia tak ucap kepada sesiapa. Rasa yang diucap melalui pena. Pena yang menari dengan jari jemari kecilnya.

VISITING TISYA :)

Assalamualaikum y'all!

whaddup peeps? I'm at currently at Shah Alam visiting my new niece, the little Batrisya Hanna! (dalam surat beranak takdak "the little" of courseeee! hehe) I'm like the last person on earth visiting her. I mean like, the very last one. my best friend did drop by first before I came and he was like, hey your niece is very cute and light. bla bla bla.. and he kept on telling me everytime we met. pfffft! since I can't help it anymore and I don't have a job, I made a decision to pay a visit!! yay!

Tisya is so adorable, cute, and fragile, for me lah kan but my mother hold her like a doll and I'm like, Mama, why you hold her like a doll? and Mama goes, misi memang pegang macam nih sambil buat muka macam nih (T.T). okay jangan melawan sifu. haha Tisya is a very good girl because she behaved all the time and didn't cry at all or even ngek and I can't hardly hear her voice. and I goes, oh mannnn!! please cry baybehhhhh! I wanna hear ya voice-sah! ya know what I mean?! haha so I ponder again and again, and decide to annoy her as much as I could. as much as I could (smile deviously) haha!

1] This is Tisya, sleeping nice and soundly.. with her body being wrapped up and talc mixed with lotion was applied all over her face. heee

2]First, I opened her "bedung" and flip her ovahhh! heeee in hopes that she will awake but I was wrong, she is still sleeping T.T

3] Then, I starts to tickle her cute little ears and she was like, what the?!!!!!!

and continue her dream T_T

4]I kept on tickling her and she moves a bit, I thought that I had annoyed her so much but she kinda enjoy it, and I was like arghhhhh!! T.T

I've run out of idea. I don't know what else I can do. I kept on disturbing her over and over and over again because I was so bored and my sister was like if she cried at night, you are responsible to babysit her! hahahaha well, people said, never give up so I annoyed her again! haha

And finally, after the all sweat I dropped, the time I spent, she cried! yay! okay, mission accomplished! the end!

CERITA KITA-KITA

dia cakap jangan. jangan nak cerita bukan-bukan. aku kata mana ada. mana ada aku nak cerita yang bukan-bukan. aku cuma nak beritahu benda betul. dengar betul-betul. dengar dulu aku cakap. dia cuak. muka berpeluh. suasana jadi sepi. lengang seketika. tap. tap. tap. peluh dia menitik. aku senyum sinis. baru nak buka mukadimah, dia cakap cukup. cukup. aku takut. aku gelak tak puas hati. Grrr.. kata aku dalam hati.

hmm.. rasa macam hari tak lengkap kalau tak kacau orang. mana boleh dia tidur dengan nyenyak. mana boleh dia terlepas. sambil senyum macam kerang busuk, aku pakat. pakat untuk menyakat. aku tahu sapa yang hebat dalam hal-hal keji macam ini. kakakku kaku bila berdiri! yeah!

akal dia panjang kalau nak buat jahat dan pendek bila nak buat baik. dia cakap dia ketuk pintu belakang. aku kata okay, kau yang pergi ketuk. aku tunggu dan gelak. dia kata okay, aku sanggup. dia pergi ketuk. sekali. kemudian, dia tak puas hati. dia ketuk lagi.

aku gelak separuh mati. kemudian telefon aku berbunyi. oh, message. aku bukak dan baca, katanya,

"weh ada orang baling batu. aku rasa macam nak rompak je. lepas tu ada orang dekat belakang tu."

aku gelak puas-puas sampai kejang urat pipi aku nih dan kemudian aku balas,

"cuba ampa tengok sapa dia."

disitu ada bayang-bayang orang berambut panjang, berkaki ayam sedang cekak pinggang. kemudian aku dengar orang kata, kurang ajo!! dia pekena kita wei!!

lepas itu aku call dan gelak sampai habis bateri. dia cakap, aku tak ada kerja. dia cakap lagi kalau betul orang nak rompak, dia sanggup tidur dekat ruang tamu rumah aku. aku gelak tanpa henti. lepas tu, aku tidurlah. tunggu apa lagi. haih. tidur dengan puas hatinya. hahahahaha

NYAMAN :)

"Kalau kita sukakan seseorang, jangan beritahu si dia. Nanti Allah kurangkan rasa cinta padanya dan Allah takkan bagi. Tapi luahkan pada Allah, beritahulah Allah. Allah maha tahu jodoh kita siapa."

WHAT'S ON MY MIND

What's on my mind? I was thinking about giving you a surprise lah. suppose to be this weekend. haha. and I am so looking forward. I've been planning for days. rescheduling for hours. and I even bought new clothes. haha haha haha (T.T)

I hope it will happen according to plan. I hope so. I've put so much efforts on this. I don't feel good about it but at least I should give a try.

Astagfirullah halazim. show me the way ya Allah. give my strength along the way. Allahuakbar.

MIMPI MIMPI KECIL

telefon berbunyi. kawan baik aku telefon. dia cakap dia nak bawak aku keluar. dia cakap nak kenalkan dekat awek dia. aku kata okay takdak hal. jomlah kawan. dia ambil aku lepas tu bawak aku pergi.

tak lama lepas tu, kami jumpa. aku senyum, awek dia tidak. kemudian, dia bawak kami pergi mall. awek dia aneh. dia tengok aku dari atas sampai ke bawah. belek dari kiri ke kanan. aku kata, 10 minit lagi kalau dia buat benda yang sama aku nak lempang dia dengan sliper aku nih.

kemudian, masa kawan aku pergi bank keluarkan duit, awek dia datang ke sisi aku dan kata kesian dekat kau kan, tak ada yang mahu. tengok aku. aku ada dia. dia kata sambil ketawa sinis. aku, yang ketika itu tengah senyum sebab jumpa seluar yang aku nak beli tu, pandang dia sambil kening tergedik-gedik geram, sambil menggigit-gigit bibir aku yang pecah itu, dan sambil kembangkan hidung tunggu api keluar.

cinabeng. berani betul dia. aku blah tanpa kata. geramnya. tiba-tiba aku rasa ada air suam-suam kuku dekat pipi. eish. mesti aku menangis nih. arghhh!!! aku tumpas. kenapa aku perlu rasa sedih tak ada yang mahu aku? mana dia tahu tak ada orang yang mahu aku? setiap manusia tu Allah swt dah ciptakan pasangan utk dia. cepat dengan lambat ja jumpa. untungnya dia, dia jumpa dulu. bukan macam aku. tengah tunggu lagi.

kemudian, aku dengar azan subuh. nyamannya. aku lap air mata dan bangun. mujurlah ini mimpi saja ya Allah! lega rasa hati. tapi, dihujung bucu kotak hati aku tu ada calar sikit. grrr... mimpi, mimpi!

30 MINUTES TO MARS

warf warf. kalau 30 minit lagi tiada orang bawa aku keluar ambil atau buang angin, kakak serta anak-anak saudara aku boleh dikejarkan ke hospital bahagia berdekatan. serious. cepat cepat! sebelum keadaan jadi semakin parah. T.T

PANDA?!

okay, I don't want to say anything.

seriously, I'm not going to say anything.

na ah ah! not saying any. T.T

not saying.. not saying.. no no no.

okay, I'll say something.

arghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!

okay bye!

EDAN MACAM NIH

aku mahu jadi abnormal. tak endah jadi normal. sebab kalau normal, aku kena rasa benda-benda yang tak sedap nih. benda-benda yang kadang kala buat muka aku yang agak comel kata kucing aku, Marie, ehem, jadi seburuk dinasour diatas nih. kalau aku jadi abnormal, atau dilahirkan tanpa perasaan, mungkin aku tak perlu rasa benda-benda tak indah ini, mahupun benda-benda yang indah. ya, aku tahu. memang luaran aku nampak macam tiada perasaan. muka kosong walaupun masa tu aku tengah cerita dekat kau orang cerita yang boleh tahan suspend nya. tapi, deep down inside, I have a very bubbly-flowerly-gedikly feeling. yeah. geli bukan? macam tak kena dengan muka bukan? okay, sudah. jangan fikir yang bukan-bukan.

edan!! boleh edan. aku boleh edan!! boleh balik cepat? sebab aku ada bertimbun cerita nak kongsi kong dengan kau. itu pun kalau kau sudi dengar macam selalu. macam hari-hari aku cerita. macam hari-hari sebelum nih. boleh? boleh? BOLEH?! Malaysia pun boleh.

PS : wall kau banyak lalat. disable cepat sebelum aku sebat T.T

When there's TOO MANY

Too many secrets

Too many stories

Too many corruption

Too many interferer

Too many faces

Too many lies

Too many hypocrites

Too many backstabber

I guess that's just...

bulshit.